What the hell is this? (Or: About the Author)

Johnny Cake. Johnny Paycheck. Johnny Toothpick.

Buster. Butterfly. Sweet Corn.

JBG. Gjerts. Me. 

Dozens of monikers.

One strange mind of John Gjertson.

It all started upon retirement.

Gjerts started making lunch for his beautiful bride, a teacher at a small elementary school in the middle of nowhere. He began by doodling a note and placing it in the brown sack. Day after day, however, the notes got more elaborate and, soon, a new "card" was placed in the lunch for all to enjoy. ("All" being the other teachers at this small elementary school in the middle of nowhere.)

After nearly two years of creative vomit, it soon became apparent it was time to expand the audience. I mean, why should only a handful of unassuming people be harassed and offended by a deranged lunatic when there's enough pure madness to reach the world and, possibly, the universe?

Ahhh ... now that's giving back.

NOTE TO NEW READERS: All cards usually have a front side and an inside and a back. Sometimes these ideas have similarity, other times they're bad jokes, other times no one understands how one thought led to the other. That said, feel free to print out your favorites for your personal, crafty use. Of course,  you'll sometimes need to scratch out Gjerts' signature and write in your own, but that's the charm of a personal gift. (If printing or posting on your site, please be a good soldier and read the copyright info by clicking here.)

NOTE TO THOSE OF YOU WHO WRITE INTO YOUR LOCAL PAPER WITH CORRECTIONS: Find the occasional missspelling? Get over it. These are often liquor-induced, sleep-deprived concepts of the utmost creativity. We all know artists can't be hemmed in by rules of spelling and grammar and simple language guidelines. Jesus.

NOTE TO RESEARCH HOUNDS WHO CAN'T SLEEP UNTIL YOU KNOW EVERYTHING ABOUT EVEN THE MOST INANE TOPICS: Where does the name cowmooraff come from? Ah yes .... explore the cowmooraff mystery here. (And yes, we know giraffe has an 'e' on the end of it, but it wasn't as funny. Or: See prior paragraph.)

Comments

[Meags]

this is BRILLIANT!
I love it!!

[johnnie]

great stuff...more please.

[Paulette]

LOL
It's always fun to see someone's else's father's insanity (follow THAT trail!) -- and to realize there is a pretty quirky gene pool out there that we're swimming in -- and having lots of fun, too
Glad you're making a big splash

[Babs]

Awesome! Fantastic artistry! This guy should think about doing a book. (OK, maybe even start one, but hey, first comes the thinking. It's all in the cognition. Thought comes before actions and feelings--so don't go by your "feelings"--I mean, use your brain man!!--So how do you feel about that??)

[johnnie guess who]

hey this stuff rocks ..where can I get more??

[Babs]

where's the new stuff???
Babs